As a parent of kids on "traveling soccer" teams, I spend a lot of time chauffeuring my kids to practices and games. With the kids progressing to better and better teams , we parents drive further to be able to compete with other competitive girls.This all means that the parents end up staying at the practices and spending a lot of time together. Eventually you get some glimpses into the relationship they have with their kids.
One of my fellow parents is a little kookie but has a heart as big as the ocean. She admits to having little to no control over her daughter. She goes out of her way to be supportive of her daughter's soccer and other interest but has mentioned more than once, that her daughter acts like she doesn't really like her. This seems odd to her because she talks about how hard she has worked over the years trying to be a friend to her . (Do you think there is a message here?)
She was telling me that she really doesn't like the fact that her daughter watches the Tyra Banks Show on television, but can not stop her. I suggested that she just tell her that she is not allowed to watch that particular show and her comment was, "yeah like that will work."
You know, this is a REALLY nice lady, who is also very intelligent and truly wishes her relationship with her daughter was better. One kind of unique thing about her is that she speaks fluent Japanese. I am thinking that maybe she needs learn how to speak the language of "teen" a little better. What do you think?
Maybe we all try a little too hard to be friends to our kids, instead of being parents and allow them to be mad at us for a while. I know I have much harder and more restrictive on my kids that she has, and it seems to me that my kids don't "like me" any less for it.
Maybe I have gained a little respect by setting a little higher standard of expectations for them, and maybe that will translate into them having a little more respect for themselves too.
